The Tooth Fairy is a Bum

When my eldest daughter lost her first tooth, we put it under her pillow full of anticipation and excitement. Then, I waited and watched. “Is she asleep, yet?” Finally, she fell asleep and I crept in stealthily to make the switch. In the morning, she woke early, like Christmas morning or her birthday. “Mama!” she cried, jumping on my still sleeping form. “I got a dollar!” And her toothless grin delighted me to no end. The second tooth was similar. And when my son started loosing his teeth, we went through all the drama again. I got to be the tooth fairy. Several times. Now she is ten. She knows it is me. She knows that after she falls asleep, I sneak in and take her nasty tooth, replacing it with a dollar. The magic is gone. Now, it is just a cash cow.

So, yesterday, Abby lost another tooth. “Let’s just put it on the counter to make it easier for the tooth fairy,” I suggested, laughing. She laughed too and shot me a knowing look. “Okay” And there the tooth sat. All night long. This morning, I even made breakfast, drank a cup of coffee and nursed the baby without seeing the wretched thing. Abby brought it to me, a sparkle in her eye. “We even made it easier on her, and she still forgot.” She said, as she handed me the tooth. “I’ll get you a dollar in a minute,” I said, winning the “Worst Mother of the Year” award. “I make a pretty lousy mom, don’t I?”

“No” replied Abby, sweetly, “Your the best mom in the world.”

But we agree that the tooth fairy is a bum.

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4 thoughts on “The Tooth Fairy is a Bum

  1. I like to think of her as experienced! If the pacifier falls on the floor with the first child we boil it. With the second we run it under really hot water. With the third we rinse it off in our mouths. Any child after that has to wrestle the dog if they want the pacifier. So, the tooth fairy isn’t a bum… just experienced.

  2. Pingback: The Tooth Fairy Redeems Herself « Wool and Chocolate

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